Crazy Laws in Colorado and Fun Facts

Did you know that it is illegal to mistreat rats in Denver, Colorado? Every state has its own unique, crazy, dumb laws and Colorado is no exception.

Here are 19 of the funniest crazy laws I discovered that are still on the books.

• In the state of Colorado, it is illegal to ride a horse while under the influence.

It would be wise to lock your drunken horse in the barn until it sobers up.

• One may not mutilate a rock in a state park.

If you’re into mutilating, take your rock home.

• In Alamosa, persons may not urinate in public.

I am speechless. Were so many citizens actually doing this that a law had to be enacted?

• Throwing missiles at cars is illegal.

We need a little clarification here. Are we talking stones, rocks, baseballs, chunks of concrete or tactical ballistic missiles?

• In Aspen, catapults may not be fired at buildings.

How about forts? Or castles?

• In Boulder, boulders may not be rolled on city property.

Wait a minute, isn’t this BOULDER, Colorado?

• It is illegal to permit one’s llama to graze on city property.

Llama? Citizens own llamas in Boulder? Who knew?

• Couches may not be placed on outside porches.

Quick! Tell Granny to drag her couch inside.

• In Cripple Creek, it is illegal to bring your horse or pack mule above the ground floor of any building.

So it is okay to have your horse or mule reside on your first floor?

• In Denver, it is illegal to mistreat rats.

There must be an extremely powerful rat lobby in that city.

• The dogcatcher must notify dogs of impounding by posting, for three consecutive days, a notice on a tree in the city park, and along a public road running through said park.

Who will be teaching all dogs to read?

• It is unlawful to lend your vacuum cleaner to your next-door neighbor.

Vacuum cleaners appear to be a protected species. Not so sure about spouses.

“A news report says last year, Colorado collected $44 million in marijuana taxes. Unfortunately, they can’t remember where they put it.” – Conan O’Brien

• In Fountain, no one may keep junk close to someone else.

Who defines what is junk? Who determines what ‘close’ is? Why is this a law?

• It is illegal to have weeds in your yard.

Unless the weed is marijuana.

Note: With the passing of Amendment 64, adults 21 or older in Colorado can legally possess one ounce (28 grams) of marijuana

• In Logan County, it is illegal for a man to kiss a woman while she is asleep.

Sleeping Beauty would still be waiting for her handsome Prince to awaken her.

• In Louisville, residents may not own chickens, but may own up to three turkeys.

Better inform the NADC immediately (National Association for Discrimination to Chickens).

• In Pueblo, it is illegal to crash into obstacles on a ski slope.

It can also be very dangerous to your health.

• It is illegal to let a dandelion grow within the city limits.

How do you inform the dandelion that it is not as acceptable as marijuana?

• In Sterling, cats may not run loose without having been fitted with a tail light.

I cannot write a retort while I am laughing myself silly. If you could sell tickets to this, you could make a fortune.

Tip: Others know you are from Colorado when your two favorite pro football teams are the Broncos . . . and whoever is beating the crap out of the Raiders.

• In Fruita, the town folk celebrate 'Mike the Headless Chicken Day'. Seems that a farmer named Olsen cut off Mike's head on September 10, 1945 in anticipation of a chicken dinner, and Mike lived for another 4 years WITHOUT a head.

• ‘Beulah red’ is the name of the rare red marble (Colorado rose onyx) that lines the interior of the Colorado State Capitol. Cutting, polishing, and installing the marble took six years from 1894 to 1900. All the ‘Beulah red’ marble in the world was used up for the Capitol.

BTW, Colorado means ‘colored red.’

• The 13th step of the state capitol building in Denver is exactly 1 mile high above sea level.

• The ‘LoDo’ region of Denver stands for Lower Downtown.

• Denver lays claim to the invention of the cheeseburger. The trademark for the name, Cheeseburger ,was awarded in 1935 to Louis Ballast of the Humpty Dumpty Drive-in.

• Residents of the 8^th largest state are known as ‘Coloradans’ although the archaic term. ‘Coloradoan,’ is still in use.

• Colfax Avenue in Denver is the longest continuous street in America.

• The highest paved road in North America is the road to Mt. Evans from Idaho Springs which climbs up to 14,258 feet above sea level.

• The United States federal government owns more than one-third of the land in Colorado.

• The tallest building in Colorado is the Republic Plaza at 57 stories high (714 feet) in Denver.

• The Dwight Eisenhower Memorial Tunnel between Clear Creek and Summit counties at an elevation of 11,000 feet is the highest auto tunnel in the world. It is 8,960 feet long and average daily traffic exceeds 26,000 vehicles.

• Leadville is the highest incorporated city in the United States at 10,430 feet elevation. Because there were numerous ‘silver’ named towns at the time, the founding fathers suggested Leadville.

• Pueblo is the only city in America with four living recipients of the Medal of Honor.

• The tallest sand dune in America is in Great Sand Dunes National Monument outside Alamosa. This bizarre 46,000-acre landscape of 700-foot-high sand peaks was created by ocean waves and wind more than one million years ago.

• At 14,110 feet above sea level, over 400,000 people ascend Pikes Peak each year.

• Lieutenant Zebulon Montgomery Pike explored the southwest portion of the Louisiana Territory in 1806, but never climbed the peak that bears his name.

• The slogan of ‘Pikes Peak or Bust,’ painted across many prairie schooners, was born as fortune hunters headed west. Only a handful of those who flocked to the region ever found gold.

• Katherine Lee Bates wrote ‘America the Beautiful’ after being inspired by the view from Pikes Peak.

• Dove Creek is the ‘Pinto Bean capital of the world.’

The pinto bean is the most popular bean in the U.S. and is most often eaten whole in broth or mashed and re-fried.

• Denver has the largest city park system in the nation with 205 parks within city limits and 20,000 acres of parks in the nearby mountains.

• The World's First Rodeo was held on July 4, 1869 in Deer Trail.

• The Rocky Mountains within Colorado contain about 52 peaks that are 14,000 feet or higher in elevation above sea level and are known as ‘fourteeners.’

• The highest mountain in Colorado is Mt. Elbert, 14,433 feet high.

• Ancient Indian cliff dwellings are located in the Mesa Verde (‘green table’) National Park.

• Mesa Verde features an elaborate four-story city carved in the cliffs by the ancestral Pueblo people between 600 and 1300 A.D.

• The mystery surrounding this ancient cultural landmark is the sudden disappearance of the thousands of inhabitants who created the more than 4,000 identified structures.

• Rocky Ford has been dubbed the ‘melon capital of the world.’

• The Roaring Fork and Frying Pan rivers are prime spots for trout fishing. The Yampa River below the northwest town of Craig is home to northern pike in the 20-pound range.

• Colorado has more microbreweries per capita than any other state.

• The Royal Gorge Bridge near Canon City is the highest suspension bridge in the world; it spans the Arkansas River at a height of 1,053 feet.

• The Kit Carson County Carousel in Burlington dates back to 1905, making it the oldest wooden merry-go-round in the United States.

• The Durango and Silverton Narrow Gauge Railroad, in continuous operation since 1881, has been featured in more than a dozen movies including ‘How the West Was Won’ (1963) and ‘Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid’ (1969).

• The world's largest natural hot springs pool (2 blocks long) is located in Glenwood Springs across the street from the historic Hotel Colorado, a favorite stop of former president Teddy Roosevelt.

• John Henry ‘Doc’ Holliday's brief and tumultuous existence led him to Glenwood Springs where he succumbed to tuberculosis and died at the Hotel Glenwood on November 8, 1887.

• Colorado's first and oldest military post, Fort Garland, was established in 1858 and commanded by the legendary frontiersman, Kit Carson.

• Florissant Fossil Beds National Monument near Cripple Creek was created by the Guffey Volcano which erupted millions of years ago, creating fossils and leaving the valley filled with petrified trees.

• Hundreds of thousands of valentines are re-mailed each year from Loveland.

• The state nickname is the Centennial State – it was admitted to the Union in the Centennial Year – 1876.

• The state tree if the Colorado Blue Spruce – blue-green in color.

• The state bird is the Lark Bunting.

• The state flower is the blue and purple Rocky Mountain Columbine – blue and purple.

• The state fossil is the stegosaurus.

• The state gemstone is the aquamarine.

• The state fish is the Greenback Cutthroat trout.

• The state grass is marijuana.

Just kidding. The state grass is Blue Grama Grass.

• John Denver made the song, ‘Rocky Mountain High,’ popular. Appropriate title these days.

• Denver is known as the Mile High City. Also an appropriate name these days.

• The popular TV series, ‘Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman.’ took place in Colorado.

• The popular book, ‘Centennial,’ written by James A. Michener takes place in Colorado.

• Colorado Springs is home to the U.S. Air Force Academy and the Air Force Space Command.

© Copyright BJ Rakow, Ph.D. 2015. All rights reserved. Author, "Much of What You Know about Job Search Just Ain't So.”